When you’re burdened with grief your thoughts are heavy.
Your heart is heavy.
Your chest is heavy.
The weight of the sense of your loss is devastating.
The loss of a parent or a sibling or a relative that you’re very close to or a friend is devastating.
However, the loss of a child is paralyzing.
It is beyond comprehension.
It is insanity unfolding itself and wrapping you up in its arms and smothering your sense of being.
It is an indescribable feeling that all at the same time is numbing and excruciating.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve.
There is no sense to be made. There is no thing that can fill the depth of the void.
It is crippling.
Time doesn’t make it better or easier.
It never lessens.
It is a burden that weighs heaviest on the spirit and the soul.
It is the most generous and prominent pain.
It is forever and abundant in its giving.
It is not lost in the forced smile or the moments of happiness.
It is not lost in the hours of work.
It does not diminish into the night sky when your body lays down to rest.
It doesn’t sleep.
It hovers like a shadow that never disappears.
It is the darkest hour that doesn’t go away.
Not Ever.
mahani 